These Tears Inside

I’m trying to hold in tidal waves of emotion. The heavy air surrounding me has to be a construct of my own mind—for most times it has been proven that I had overreacted to my darker fears. I don’t know all the aspects of my strength yet…I still have so much to learn about her. Days like today, I wonder whether she is always present when I believe her to be, or if she’s nothing more than a skilled pretender. All I know is that she can be a little bit of both all at once.

These tears inside are a reminder that my heart is still fragile, and that this element will probably always be a part of it. Sometimes, as I’m falling asleep at night, there come moments where my weakness is felt with a strong pull—one that is nearly too much for me take. Then I have to remember how the late night hours can wage their influence on my thoughts and consume me with false, haunting images. I have to recall the fighter inside, and encourage her to continue on despite the constant push and pull. Once sleep comes, resolve is rebuilt and bravery is restored.

These tears inside will eventually be released, but there is no room in my life for them to break me anymore…


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