Never-ending nightmare beautiful dream
How long how strong will your ways take hold of me?
Cannot hold you
Cannot release you
I save my own soul
To keep in dreaming awake
Early morning tide so low
Your heart was more than I could take
I let you break upon, take another piece of me
Not even time could set me free.

To wait, the flame fading fast
Too long it burns…refuses death to come and pass
To leave each breath feeling like my last
Never-ending emotion makes me wonder
Where I was left last in sleep
And if I own the strength to quiet rather than keep
Never-ending nightmare beautiful dream

Could I not have lost you somewhere?
To have protected my life, too precious for your care
I’d take down my shelter
Take in the bittersweet wreckage which remains
From you and I
For the undetermined; for the lovely crack in my sight
To be brought back to even the shadows cast outside of your light
I curse this never-ending longing for temporary delights

Take me over, take me under, take me in most willingly
As long as I can resurface
Slowly release an embrace
That asks questions and gives no answers
And provides no hope for grace
If you would devour me I’d almost want to fall
If only you would see
But I know you won’t; unwillingly

They say love doesn’t suit its name
Though it bound me to you; holds me in disdain
Could words unspoken be more silent?
Never-ending nightmare beautiful dream
My heart won’t ever let you go

Carrie Gilbert 2009


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